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This short was inspired by Marion Keye’s 4-weeks course “So You Want to Write a Novel” that she taught via Instagram in early 2021. Her first writing prompt was “The doughnuts failed to de-escalate the situation“. We had to write 500 words starting with this phrase. Johnny and the Alien was my first attempt.

WARNING! Strong language is used in this story!

Enjoy!

Drawing of Donuts (or doughnuts!)

The donuts had failed to de-escalate the situation. Johnny takes a bite anyway. He is hungry. Mary looks at him, puzzled.

“Did you think that buttering us up with donuts would do the trick?” asks Mary.

“No, I just thought that we all might need a little bit of sugary inspiration,” replies Johnny. “It’s been a rough day for everyone.”

“Fair play,” says Siobhan. “I’ll take one. Maybe it will help me contemplate how we are going to deal with this 10-foot alien that just took over the company”.

Johnny takes another bite and looks at Siobhan. This is all his fault. He should have never told anyone about Gable. He should have just kept it all to himself.

Gable had literally fallen into Johnny’s life a week ago.

It was a typical Sunday morning. Johnny woke up, put the kettle on, made himself some toasted cheese and sat by his window contemplating the day. It was pouring rain – well, it is Ireland after all. Johnny had planned to stay at home and catch up with some chores and maybe a bit of reading. He had some of his favourite comic books to catch up on. “Invaders of the Ancient Sea” had just released a collector’s edition of their first-ever issue. “There we go,” Johnny thought to himself, “the day has been planned. I think I’ll take a shower”.

Johnny slurps up the rest of his tea and heads to the bathroom. As he climbs the stairs of his two-bedroom semi-detached home, there is a sudden power cut.

“Ah shit, I wonder if there is enough hot water for my shower?”

The lights flicker on again.

“Phew. Thank god that was a short one”.

Johnny enters the bathroom, takes off his jammies and slides back the shower curtain.

“WHAT THE FUCK??????” he screams and passes out.

When Johnny awakens, he finds himself lying naked on the bathroom floor. His vision is blurred, but as he regains consciousness and clarity, he looks up to find a rather strange-looking creature staring down at him.

The creature is tall, like REALLY tall. So tall that it is crouched down with its back and head touching the ceiling. It has very smooth glossy skin, the colour of grey but with glimmering hints of purple. Its head is enormous, like a massive rugby ball. Its head alone is probably about 2 feet, and the rest of its scrawny naked body is around 8 feet long. It is sitting in the bathtub with its legs pulled into its body. Its arms are also very long, wrapping around its legs multiple times. The creature looks down at Johnny with all four eyes of different colours.

Momentarily Johnny thinks he must be dreaming. This can’t be real, can it? I’ll wake up in a moment, he thinks. Then, it will all be ok.

But he doesn’t wake up. He just lays on his bathroom floor stark bollock naked, looking up at this bizarre creature. The creature just stares right back at him.

About 20 minutes pass by, and Johnny realizes that he needs to do something.

But what the fuck do you do when you find a 10-foot glossy grey creature with a massive rugby ball-shaped head and four eyes in your bathtub?